Home-Start Blackmore Vale
There for parents when they need us most, because childhood can't wait
Just as there is no typical family that Home-Start supports, there is also no typical home-visiting volunteer. Some get involved because they have time to spare, enjoy listening, getting to know and help families who live in their community. Others feel they would like to give something back having been supported themselves through hard times. All give their most precious asset: Time. A rare and wonderful thing to spare someone in our frantic and busy lives.
Volunteer 1
I have been visiting families in North Dorset for 5 years. The premise is simple. Give 2-3 hours a week to visit a family you are carefully matched to, in their own home. The family is on board with the support and so as a volunteer you always feel welcomed in. I have worked with single Mums, Mums and Dads together, very young Mums and ones who have come to parenting late. All the families have at least one child under the age of 5.
So what happens in those 2 hours? A lot of listening, chatting, getting down on the floor and playing with small people, often giving Mum a much needed break. I have supported a few families where mobility for the Mums has been an issue, so I’ve needed to get in touch with my inner 5 year old and raced around the park with the children. One Mum was new to the area and had an 8 month old and felt very isolated. We spent the majority of my visits walking and talking, her working through the difficulties she was facing with a rocky relationship and all the changes that come with being a new Mother. By the end of our time together she’d found new perspective on her situation and a newfound confidence.
“I am not there to provide answers or offer advice. We all have to find solutions to our own problems; sometimes it just helps to have someone giving you the space to work them out.”
Volunteers 3
A single dad of one daughter.
Being a Home-Start volunteer for dad and draughter enabled him to have some time to himself that he missed greatly, so once a week on my visit he would love to go for a bike ride for an hour, do a food shop for the week in peace or make a few important phone calls he hadn’t had time to make. Dad grew in confidence and even started up a single dad’s group which became very popular for a while.
During this time away from his daughter I would reading stories to her as she loved books, we would bake Peppa pig cupcakes as this was her favourite character on tv and go for either a walk or trip to the park which she loved. The benefits to dad and daughter were learning to trust someone to be part of their lives even for a short time, to give dad valuable time to be himself, and encourage his daughter to trust, be sociable and learn how to share in the comfort of her own home. During my support, I feel I learned that not everyone is the same, people do struggle in life and it’s ok to ask for help. I learned to listen more and be confident in the advice I gave and always had respect for others. It was a wonderful time with this family, and it made me very proud when I knew that my support had made a difference in both their lives.
Volunteer 2
I have been ‘the friend’ for someone attending the Toddler Group for the first time, or going to the dentist, or taking a trip to the library, or being there for moral support in a meeting with a social worker. We have faced the dreaded supermarket trips with unwilling toddlers together. Laughed together in the face of typical parenting craziness. Sadly a few Mums had escaped abusive relationships and needed reminding that they are doing a good job and it is hard, and they are not alone.
I have never worked with a parent who doesn’t want to be the best parent they can be. I have learnt something from every family I have supported and have taken great pleasure in watching how giving such a simple thing, just a few hours a week can make such a difference. If parents are feeling supported and listened to that can only be a good thing for the children.
Volunteers 4
This is from one of our MIM peer supporter:
Volunteering for the Home-Start Mothers in Mind group is a wonderful and rewarding experience. Having suffered PND myself, I believe this group is crucial to many new mothers who are struggling with their mental health. I was asked to be a peer supporter by the perinatal mental health team when I was discharged from their care as I had expressed an interest in using my own experience to help other mothers. It sounded great I have not looked back!
The group is a really safe space for mothers to gather and talk openly and provides a well deserved break for them too. We offer a friendly ear and informal support. As someone who has always enjoyed craft and has a background in teaching, I really enjoy leading some of the craft sessions we share. The therapeutic element of craft creates a relaxed atmosphere while babies and toddlers, including my own, can be looked after by kind volunteers within the group setting. The group is a way for me to give back, to make sense of what I went through and turn a negative experience into a positive way of helping others.
